Moving on!

Funny how tuck away memories stir up emotions. Hadn't thought about the little restaurant that was once called Fred's News, in quite sometime. Most certainly a day does not pass, memories of the folks that frequented the little place, hop into the forefront! If we have said it once, we've said it a million times, "it's the people we miss!"  Often we wondered, does this small town, tucked away in amongst the rolling green hills of the Shetucket River Valley, feel the same?

For years we were "The Constant Place," in the lives of the many lovable and ever so quirky people that became so appropriately known as the Fred's News Family. Yet, deep seeded within the minds of many, were thoughts that this was a very liberal self indulgent family,who only thought of themselves. Although no one ever said those exact words, at times hurtful insinuations were heard. Sometimes sarcastic barbs often hold the true feelings of the person trading the jabs.

As business owners, we thought it most important to invest in our town, specifically the young people. With weekly day trips planned throughout the summer months for any of the young people, we often visited the beaches of Long Island Sound or the fresh water state parks of inland Connecticut. A chance for the town to get a much needed respite from the youthful antics, if only for a day, but more importantly, it introduced many of the underprivileged young people to life beyond the small village. Thinking of it as a chance for a seed to be planted in the minds of the young, they would want to explore, learn and perhaps years later, they too would invest in their town. As the summer months waned, the town saw a need to sell the local school bus fleet to an outside, for profit company, ending all hopes for the next year's summer field trips. Having served on both Board of Education and Finance, I understood the decision, but heartily disagreed.

As time passed, nothing much changed within this or the lives of the citizens in the town, progress seemed to pass by this town, the neighborhoods falling deeper into despair. Mr. Bill's efforts to beautiful the town with his sweet smelling, vibrant array of glorious flowers, grew larger and larger every years. Although it was a labor of love and  a chance to show all how beautifully quaint the little town was, ironically there was still deep seeded resentment by some.  We truly loved this place, staying involved, trying to update and show others, perseverance pays.

There comes a time when the body and mind grows weary.  Our children grown, none wanting the "family business," but that was fine.  We had taught our children to grow, to wander, to experience and most of all, be passionate in whatever they chose to do.  Having made our mark, a so called legacy, the mind, body and soul yearned for more.  It was our time to "practice what we had preached" for so long.  More importantly, it was me! Still young enough for a second career, Mr. Bill wanting to retire, there would be no argument from me!

Looking back, I truly think the people of the town thought of us more as a fixture, "The Constant Place" was most assuredly going to be there forever.  We see it as "out of sight, out of mind!"  For the most part, this is true, with an occasional message that warms the heart and soul, letting us know we were truly appreciated.

Perhaps, my thoughts are sometimes harsh, the heart is not.  Only now, we know, we truly did leave a legacy, still,  it was time.  Without overstaying our welcome, we moved on.  Visitors from the north do come, sometimes we wish for more.  The question is always asked, "when will you return?"  I always answer, "when will you come visit?'

Sentries of the Earth

A very slow start to the rainy season, but in all actuality ,the monsoon like afternoon rains are really a few weeks away. Today, just as the past week has been, thick clouds move in rapidly, you can almost see the thunderheads forming above. As the rains begin to fall, the hardened grounds beckon every drop. This tropical peninsula, a giant sandbar, is now more like hardened and weathered cement.

As we walk the pathways along the golf course, the stately magnolias, live oaks, and Spanish moss laden and hauntingly beautiful cypress trees seem to have risen skyward, as if looking and begging for moisture. Craggy, gnarly root systems, bulging upward through the hardened ground, fan out in every direction, seeking the elusive elixir of life, water. These roots fascinate me, they have seen how cruel Mother Nature can be, depriving them of their life blood, yet these hardened weather worn veins have experienced this before. Their talon like grip on the hardened ground suggests only survival, nothing more, certainly nothing less. A true partnership with the earth, they stand hearty and tall protecting the very ground on which they stand, from the blistering rays of the scorching fireball high in the mid-day sky.  Much like the skeletal system on the top of our hands, these weathered roots suggest the guardians of the forest, these majestic trees, have age. They have withstood all that the forces of nature have thrown at them. They are a giant high rise community, home to generation after generation of forest creatures.

Walking further along the picturesque paths, we notice, a few of the smaller trees have given in to the forces surrounding them. With a strong foundation a necessity, these much younger trees have lost their battle in the survival of the fittest. Eerily they lean, almost begging their elders for support, their root system, talons much too short, have surrendered. All too soon, critters of destruction will move in, sucking what meager life remains from the bowels of the foundation. This circle of life, within the tropical rain forest is such a fragile system. I believe it's beauty radiates forth for a reason. The fallen ones stand as a reminder to the hordes of humans that destroy, taking for granted, using and abusing these majestic sentries standing guard over the lands. Sadly, if we do not nourish and replenish, our world will be filled with regrets.

A Free-Thinker...I am, I am!

A recent conversation embroiled with opinions, ultimate reasons, accusatory shouting matches, non-believers and believers, career minded and some not so much, those of both sexes, including male chauvinists of all age ranges, was perhaps one of the most satisfying, invigorating and lively conversations I have participated in for quite some time. Throughout my career I have tried to avoid subjects directly related to religion and politics unless in a group of clergy or politicians.  The conversation mentioned contained neither group but all subjects were fair game. Truly a great eye-opening experience!  Sadly, not all involved in this lively debate, cherished the moment as much as me.

For the record, we must first say: One must approach these moments with an open-mind, heart and an ability to absorb what others are trying to say even if they continue to say,"no, that's not exactly what I mean!" If someone is asked to vote on a motion, in a democratic society, it is usually a given that one will vote yay, nay or just abstain, or so one would think.  Letting the chips fall where they may, you can't take back your vote.  Pondering this thought for just a moment, I surmise many in the room looked around to see how the majority voted and rather than stand by their convictions, said "oh well, what the hell, I will go with the majority, they must be right!"  Over the course of the next few weeks, the defeated dug their heals into the trenches, preparing for battle, taking bits and pieces out of context, seeking to rally the masses and reverse decisions.  All's fair in love and war, past history not being learned, their mistakes, unfortunately altered all future hopes of moving forward and the situation remains at status quo. 

Coining a new phrase, "return to the age of the dinosaurs," those who stand by their decisions, resigned.  Those, who at some point were most outspoken, did a complete three sixty, crying wah, wah, wah and now again rub shoulders with those they sought to vilify.  When I was asked my opinion, staunchly defending my beliefs, I replied, "how hypocritical, I am not a hypocrite nor do I intend to be branded as one.  If we are "returning to the Age of the Dinosaurs," please accept my resignation.

So be it, decisions made, life goes on.  Never one to dwell for long on the could of, should of or would of, lively conversations with constituents is always good for the soul.  Perhaps a cleansing, certainly not a time to "clean closets" but to voice opinions, present facts and at the same time welcome and accept opinions.  Dinosaurs, much like trying to "teach an old dog new tricks," welcome and accept nothing, forcing negativity into the forefront, hopes dashed, free-thinking society must "free-think" elsewhere.  Sadly, repeating, rehashing, rephrasing, reiterating, dinosaurs refuse to change.  Should they re-read history, many refusing to learn from their past, repeat mistakes, extinction is sure to follow. 

Death is inevitable, yet one should never adopt the policy of "sticking your head in the sand." or becoming submissive to those who opt for grandeur through title. As eons pass us by at warp speeds, adaptation is necessary for survival, but acceptance of the status quo, refusing to "think outside the box,"  is a very boring journey!

Reminders.........the Simplicity and Sweetness of Life

Today, a reminder of why we migrated south to this tropical paradise known as Florida.  Although the early morning, just cool enough, allowing the sweet citrus vapors to drift through open windows, the partly cloudy skies would soon give way to a sweet Mother Mary Novena Blue,  a brilliance that radiates images back to the earth so breathtakingly striking, one yearns for more!  With stiff breezes bordering all out windy, one forgets that this land is tropical rain forest HOT for much of the late spring, summer and early fall seasons of the year.

This southern sky, with it's infinite expanse, tells a story.  Today's clouds, so descriptive, would have allowed a soft blanket in the grass on which a body could observe these tremendous marshmallow like puffs floating quickly by, had it not been the thought of the multitudes of ants at ground level.  Nice thought, however, a walk at the edge of the preserve or seashore will have the suffice.

As the afternoon sun begins its descent toward the western horizon, the stiff warm breezes continuing, we decide, sitting outside amongst the gorgeous display of fragrant gardenias, majestic royal purple petunias, perfectly showcased by the emerald green and white flowing spider plants cascading downward, would be a great ending to a near picture perfect day in the outdoors.

Rehashing the events of our day, sipping icy cold sweet green teas, we are treated to not one or two but three of Mother Nature's elusive and endangered  raptors in flight.  The swallow-tailed kite only makes its appearance mid-March through mid-May, it's striking black and white plumage so vivid against the tropical setting sun.  As we watched these birds in flight, realizing how rarely we are treated to their company, we must learn more about our southern feathered friends.  Built for speed, these birds only number around three to four thousand, will soon be leaving for their winter feeding grounds, some as far south as Brazil.

A quick search of the Internet reveals, the Audobon Society tracks these graceful birds of prey as they cross-cross the southern skies, from their breeding homes in the southeast to their winters in South America.  Drops in their numbers caused by disappearing wetlands, pesticides and sport shooting, the Society's plea for help tracking these majestic and distinguished looking hunters would be our pleasure and a sincere a heartfelt thanks and commitment to our environment and those whose time, patience and diligence will insure these and all the creatures that share this planet, will continue to flourish.

Deja vu...Oh yes...Been There done That!

Deja vu, the illusion of having previously experiences something being encountered for the first time.  Its origin is French, its meaning, literally already seen.  Deja vu becoming the go to word around 1900-05.  Always interested in word origins, my mind tells me time to check it out. With a tad bit of research, my findings, interesting yet just a bit more of useless info added to my already overcrowded brain. Although I do not consider myself a hoarder, my brain signals, IT IS!

Sounding much like a hauntingly, even sensually romantic question, "Mon cherie, croyez-vous en déjà vue?"would be appropriate if whispered softly in a passionate moment.  Yet translate that beautiful phrase to English, "My love do you believe in the already seen?" Not quite the same effect, you might as well just quip, "Hey baby have ya been there, done that?"

That bit of useless trivia behind us, I decided to search further, our friend deja vu also has a scientific name; Promnesia.  This term, describes the phenomenon of deja vu, coming from Modern Latin, who I might add, derived it from the Greeks mean, pro-"before" plus mnesia-"memory." Keeping that thought, let's look at the origins of amnesia.  This little word became vogue around 1780-90 (can't remember exactly!), the Neo-Latin tongues stole it from the Greeks (again) and is a variant of the word amnestia meaning "oblivion".  My mind in a tizzy, delving deeper into this mystery of words, amnestia, for the record was not in the dictionary or at least not mine. Ironically, perhaps they forgot it!  Deciding to use word search, amnestia, is mentioned.  2437 Amnestia is a main belt asteroid and was discovered on September 14, 1942 by, can't seem to remember, in the city of Turku on the southwest coast of Finland at the mouth of the Aura River, in the region of Finland Proper. Turku is believed to have been first settled around the 13th century, (they can't remember either) and the predominant language spoken is Swedish! They seem to have forgotten they are in FINLAND!

With all this info meaning absolutely nothing, deja vu still intrigues me.  Having had moments of " Mon cherie, croyez-vous en déjà vue?" okay "been there done that!"  words intrigue me.  How we say them, what we insinuate, what is perceived, everyone processes words and phrases, differently. We perceive certain languages to ooze of sensuality, French, Italian and Spanish, the first to come to mind.  When spoken fluently, these words of passion are beautiful, yet it is the thinkers, the free-spirited, the brain hoarders that questions everything and accept nothing as status quo that truly intrigues us all. 

Oh No the Big 60!

Five and a half hours and counting, to the birthday, another milestone so they tell me.  A barrage of the usual questions have begun to appear, some pretty standard, others, let's just say,"not so much!"   I prefer Mark Twain's comment regarding the aging process, "wrinkles should merely indicate where smiles have been!" All that aside, I don't really think of age as a number, instead, it's how you feel.  For the most part pretty good!  The usual aches and pains, no more than the previous fifteen years of my life.  Warmer weather has been a tremendous help on the old bones.  Things have a tendency to work much better when they are warm versus all scrunched up under an afghan trying to keep warm.

Social media a great way to say Happy Birthday and post all the cutesy little messages.  Those that have passed this way before me are the first to send their condolences, "oh  no the BIG 60!" "Wow, when you gonna collect Social Security?" Bodily functions seem to warrant conversation space as well!  Please spare me, everyone is well aware of the fact that when you drink and eat, you pee and poop, so goes the natural cycle of the body. So what does bother me?  Gravity! Oh bugger, I should live on the moon.  Weighing next to nothing, no pressure on the bones and perky body parts, NICE!

Looking forward, I have no plans to retire.  If I were to, I would merely be recycling myself.  My mind, always in a continuous state of perpetual motion,  constantly reminding and nagging the body, "you G-damn wimp, keep up!"  My brain was probably a reject from a Marine drill instructor, my body doesn't listen to ME either!

Occasionally, I look back, time has passed at warp speed, my children in the infancy stages of middle age, yet they will always be the kids.  Pride and admiration for my kids rush forth, swelling within my heart.  Some near others far, they will always be my kids.  I will worry, I will call, offer advice when asked, allow the memories tucked neatly away to bring smiles that warm me to the very core and I will look forward to new exciting ways of living the life that continues to beckon and impress me.  Never having been one to wallow, it is a senseless waste of time.  Life is all about can do and will do.  So instead of "when ya gonna retire?" I prefer, "What ya gonna be when you grow up?"  I don't really know but I'll let you know when I get there!

Relaxing Within

Fairfield, Iowa is billed as the safest, greenest and happiest town in America.  Transcendental Meditation being the reason, yet before we jump to conclusions and pass judgment, we need to look beyond only what we see no farther than the end of our nose.  On a recent broadcast of Oprah, the Next Chapter, we were introduced the citizens of this small town and their extraordinary way of life.  For those that view this lifestyle as the following of a certain ethnic or religious group, I say poo-poo to you.  If one's mind, body and soul are aligned, it must truly be a wonderful experience.  How often we are pulled in a multitude of directions, worrying needlessly and wishing the mind would stop launching hurdles every time we round the next corner. A pure dream come true to be able to wind down, sort things out and proceed with a feeling of inner well-being that would shine forth in our ever so cluttered material world.

Elizabeth Gilbert's book, Eat Pray Love, relates her struggle to become just such a person.  In a marriage of one-sided happiest she sets forth on a mission to truly search her soul and find out is there is such a thing as true inner peace.  I adore this woman's determination and what an opportunity,  travelling the world, experiencing cultures most just read about, what a lucky and fortunate woman.

In past years my family always asked, "Mom what do you want for your birthday?"  Pondering a bit, I would reply, "a simple Happy Birthday and a hug!"  Pressured for a more materialistic answer, my response was always. "there is nothing I need, but if you must, I would like a day off.  Truly a day off, no decision making, no mediating, no NOTHING! (double negative but it drives the point home.)  The caveat being, when the day is finished, the next always arriving, do not tell me of the previous day's problems, issues or anything else, unless of course it is a major life threatening issue.  For the record, never having received this gift, the hug and poignant Happy Birthday message was and always will be lovingly exquisite.

Questions always remained unanswered. "what would you do with such a day, had your wish been granted? Simply put, "relaxing from within, processing thoughts and breathing in my surroundings,  perhaps a personal transcendental meditation!"