The Underwear are Packed!

Vacation has officially arrived!  Although I do not leave for Paris until tomorrow, no worries, no work, just hanging out!  Making a list of items that must be packed is a necessity and has been an ongoing process all week.  Yet I know there will probably be SOMETHING I forget.  This brings to mind the Egg-Nazi's underwear!  Making a long story into a somewhat shorter version:  our first trip driving cross-country, young adult children in charge at Fred's News, everything in place, to do lists completed, instructions for preparing, ordering and serving the very best are all in place....NOTHING.......has been left to chance.  Matthew would be the morning Chef; Mark, the soup of the day sous chef as well as the Baker; Todd, not really thrilled with working the customers, would be the nightly cleanup coordinator and Jack-of-all-trades handyman, just in case. With all this in place, we felt pretty confident the little restaurant would survive. 

Thankfully, stories of "the happenings"  during our much more brief vacations, had not yet surfaced. Had we known of the "employee parties" complete with the holiday alcohol given to us by our loyal customers or the "how many young adults can we squeeze inside the family shower" after consuming the holiday alcohol and whatever else was "brought in" including tons of munchies from either the restaurant or "invited Guests", which I might add were used to appease ravenous appetites, resulting from the consuming of liquid refreshments and any other "product" that had been used to help enhance the "party atmosphere."  As much as our children argued as brothers, ratted each other out, the "mother of all parties" seemed to be encased in a shield of "stealthiness", not even the best investigators could crack.  Even more mind boggling is the fact that parents of "the invited Guests", which ninety-five percent of the time were also our loyal customers, never seemed to get wind of these functions.  My guess is, "As long as the little restaurant known as Fred's News was opened on time, the eye opening and sensory stimulant known as Fred's fresh brewed coffee was available at the ass-crack of dawn, these loyal customers didn't give a rat's ass what had gone down! At this point a number of questions should have popped up:  How slow moving and stoned looking was the morning crew?  Obviously the early morning patrons, complete with hair still tousled, sleep in their eyes and the inability to speak in anything other than a growl, never noticed.  For those that did arrive, wide eyed and bushy-tailed,  the antics of their youth, with wonderfully vivid memories, prevented this from been reported.  Did they not notice more vehicle than normal parked in the back driveway or the stream of young people arriving via the back door for breakfast, all looking as though they had "one helluva night!"  Regardless, all these young adults are now either thirty somethings or have hit the over-the-hill age of forty, have families of their own or successful careers, can laugh at the antics much like their parents still do of their much younger years and worry that perhaps their children may someday share the the same "life experiences" as they have.

Long-time friend and frequent visitor Ward is scheduled to arrive within the hour.  He has driven down to spend the week with his "bud" whom he affectionately calls Uncle Billy!  As for me, I am off to Paris, compliments of youngest son Mark, who has been working with his teams all Europe since the beginning of June.  I will meet him Tuesday morning for a six day vacation of non-stop walking, observing, sight-seeing and just plain fun.  Mr. Bill and Ward....a week of golf, "friendship bonding" and whatever else the two may conjure up.  My lists are are hopefully complete as is this story with the exception of Mr. Bill's underwear or my memory of them.  As we left for vacation, kid's in charge, Mr. Bill had "packed his own bags" as I was so consumed with the smooth transition of managerial powers during our absence.  I clearly remember asking him, "did you pack EVERYTHING?" A resounding "YES" echoed throughout.  Our first night, a stop in Tennessee, Mr. Bill takes a long relaxing shower, dries off and begins to search his bag for underwear, as I see the clothes being pulled out at a frantic pace, I feel a sense of smugness, "he packed his OWN bags!" "sweetheart, is something missing, did YOU forget to pack your"drawers?" I demurely asked trying to fight back the laughter.  "No, there in here someplace" he whips back.  "Let me call the boys", I calmly reply, "I left them on the bed all folded and ready for you to put in your bag!"  Of course no answer from the big guy.  As I dial home, the phone is answered, small talk follows and one of our lovely children questions, "How come Pop's underwear is still sitting in the middle of your bed?" Had I not been rolling on the floor doubled over in laughter, the question might have popped into my head.."What the hell are they doing in my bedroom?"