Doesn't happen too often but today was just a down right soggy, gloomy day. Clouds lingered for the better part of the day, although the rains ceased around noon time, with a brisk wind from the north, making for much chillier temps than the past week. By Florida standards, it was so....un-tropical. On the flip side...if one hailed from the colder climates to our north....today, much like the April showers, that bring the you know-whats-in-May!
The inclement weather good for appetites, making for quite the chaotic morning. Much like the busy mornings at Fred's News, someone or something always stood out "in the or at the crowd". That not so appetizing aroma of burnt toast, waifed through the dining room this morning, stirring up memories of those over used, pain in the butt toasters, probably still sitting in their final resting places, within the hauntingly quiet walls of the former Fred's News. Interestingly enough, those little toaster more than paid for themselves......and oh the abuse! They deserve more than they got...should have been bronzed and mounted, as a final tribute for their faithful years. Poked, prodded, slammed, turned upside, shaken until they spewed forth the entire contents of their innards,yet much like the "pink bunny" they took a "lickin and kept on tickin!" Even when they tried to just quit or lay down and die, we resisted their pleas. Adding insult to injury, their own family let.....that greasy, grimy Johann, the Nephew....Great, violate them. Dear God, what were we thinking!
Patrons learned early on, "ya see smoke" billowing from the toaster area, first, head to the nearest smoke detector, take out the battery, THEN and only THEN, holler..."hit the toaster!" Most people walking by the restaurant knew, all too well, that smell of burnt toast. Kathleen, always the artsy environmentality advocate, found wonderful use for burnt toast......Christmas Ornaments...oh soooooo thoughtful and definitely one of a kind. With the amount of burnt bread, Fred's News could of mass produced these ornaments...probably would of sold well at Walmart during the holiday season. When the season was over, hang them outside for our feathered friends, although I am sure they'd still be there in the Spring, even John and Rocco Carboni admitted they'd had enough burnt toast to last a lifetime....!!
So this morning as a Guest approached me with the look of concern, a word need not be spoken, that all too familiar aroma had suddenly violated my air space. "We have a fire in the toaster!" she tried to calmly report, but the look of concern told me otherwise. As I rounded the corner, I heard the sound of coughs and someone yelling, "where is the plug, pull the plug!" Other family members were attacking the poor toaster with plastic utensils, which by the way were disfigured from the heat and adding to the aroma. As if that weren't enough, this "odoriffic" smell now being transported to other parts of the hotel via the air ducts. As I walked towards the Guests doing harm to the toaster, I remained surprisingly calm, having travelled this road many times before....".Please stand back from the toaster, it will be fine." I reassure the crowd now holding their pool towels over their noses. As I retrieve the burnt object from the "guts" of the poor toaster, I realize, it is not your ordinary piece on bread, but the burnt remains of a cheese danish! I will not write what I wanted to say, we do know one can warm a danish in the microwave, ironically that correct piece of equipment was located right next to the smoking toaster! Enough said. My only thoughts were, if anyone staying at the Lodge had ever visited Fred's News, they would of recognized the smell. Kathleen, if you would like to retire in Florida, perhaps I can persuade you to begin marketing burnt toast or pastry ornaments...we've got a much larger clientele NOW!
The inclement weather good for appetites, making for quite the chaotic morning. Much like the busy mornings at Fred's News, someone or something always stood out "in the or at the crowd". That not so appetizing aroma of burnt toast, waifed through the dining room this morning, stirring up memories of those over used, pain in the butt toasters, probably still sitting in their final resting places, within the hauntingly quiet walls of the former Fred's News. Interestingly enough, those little toaster more than paid for themselves......and oh the abuse! They deserve more than they got...should have been bronzed and mounted, as a final tribute for their faithful years. Poked, prodded, slammed, turned upside, shaken until they spewed forth the entire contents of their innards,yet much like the "pink bunny" they took a "lickin and kept on tickin!" Even when they tried to just quit or lay down and die, we resisted their pleas. Adding insult to injury, their own family let.....that greasy, grimy Johann, the Nephew....Great, violate them. Dear God, what were we thinking!
Patrons learned early on, "ya see smoke" billowing from the toaster area, first, head to the nearest smoke detector, take out the battery, THEN and only THEN, holler..."hit the toaster!" Most people walking by the restaurant knew, all too well, that smell of burnt toast. Kathleen, always the artsy environmentality advocate, found wonderful use for burnt toast......Christmas Ornaments...oh soooooo thoughtful and definitely one of a kind. With the amount of burnt bread, Fred's News could of mass produced these ornaments...probably would of sold well at Walmart during the holiday season. When the season was over, hang them outside for our feathered friends, although I am sure they'd still be there in the Spring, even John and Rocco Carboni admitted they'd had enough burnt toast to last a lifetime....!!
So this morning as a Guest approached me with the look of concern, a word need not be spoken, that all too familiar aroma had suddenly violated my air space. "We have a fire in the toaster!" she tried to calmly report, but the look of concern told me otherwise. As I rounded the corner, I heard the sound of coughs and someone yelling, "where is the plug, pull the plug!" Other family members were attacking the poor toaster with plastic utensils, which by the way were disfigured from the heat and adding to the aroma. As if that weren't enough, this "odoriffic" smell now being transported to other parts of the hotel via the air ducts. As I walked towards the Guests doing harm to the toaster, I remained surprisingly calm, having travelled this road many times before....".Please stand back from the toaster, it will be fine." I reassure the crowd now holding their pool towels over their noses. As I retrieve the burnt object from the "guts" of the poor toaster, I realize, it is not your ordinary piece on bread, but the burnt remains of a cheese danish! I will not write what I wanted to say, we do know one can warm a danish in the microwave, ironically that correct piece of equipment was located right next to the smoking toaster! Enough said. My only thoughts were, if anyone staying at the Lodge had ever visited Fred's News, they would of recognized the smell. Kathleen, if you would like to retire in Florida, perhaps I can persuade you to begin marketing burnt toast or pastry ornaments...we've got a much larger clientele NOW!
When Rico took over the store, he experienced the same problems with the old toasters. It seems he couldn't get a decent piece of toast out of those old machines. Enter Keith the boy genius. Keith found a solution to the problem by cannabalizing the innards of a smoke detector. By tweaking the height of the detector above the toaster, the detector would alarm from the smoke emitted from a perfectly toasted piece of bread. I saw it in action and while not pretty, it worked as dependably as a Maytag washing machine!
ReplyDeleteMy God leave it to the Nephew! Do toasters have feelings? "Revenge of the Toasters!"
ReplyDelete